Senior News Line: Are we seniors yet?

When do we actually become seniors? That varies, depending who we ask.

Is it age 50, when all the AARP ads come to our mailbox? Maybe it’s age 60, when we can get food assistance through the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program or receive Meals on Wheels deliveries.

Is it 62, when we can start to collect some of our Social Security? If we’re taking a Gallup Poll, 65 is the starting senior age.

How about age 65, when we need to sign up for Medicare or pay a penalty later if we don’t? Or, is it 66 or 67, when we can collect more Social Security, or age 70, when we can collect even more?

Are we finally seniors at age 73, when we need to take out some of our individual retirement account or pay a penalty on our taxes?

Then there are those instances that vary by state or industry or location to determine if we are seniors yet: auto insurance, retirement homes or communities, cellphone service providers, restaurants, grocery stores, train travel, motels, senior low-income programs, museums, theaters and Department of Motor Vehicles in-person renewals.

Most disturbing, however, of all the senior-related numbers were the results of a poll that asked: At what age should women stop wearing jeans?

Stop wearing jeans? What kind of person even comes up with ideas like that? It was decided, as a result of that poll, that age 53 is when women should hang up the denim.

I don’t mind being asked if I’d like the senior discount in a restaurant. I don’t mind being told I should apply for the local seniors electric bill help.

But I fear the day is coming when the pendulum swings in the other direction and we might have to prove we’re young enough to buy a pair of jeans.